I write this because I just watched a video that deeply disturbed me. It's a video that, on the shallow and superficial level, appeared very kind and sweet and even gave the impression of being a solution to the problem of sexism. However, when viewed at a deeper level it seems to be promoting many greater problems.
The video that I'm discussing involves a group of men apologizing to women for their mistreatment at the hands of men throughout history, once again this appears to be kind, sweet, and a solution. But, the video proceeds to take on the flavor that everything Feminine is 'good' and everything masculine is 'evil' and it proceeds to behave as if men and women are separate. These are very destructive views that, in my opinion, ignore the core problems.
In my own journey of self discovery I have learned that in my past lives I have been a wide variety of people. I have been a ruthless feudal Hungarian lord who beat his servants mercilessly for the sake of beating them. I have been a shaman in a small Aztec village who was deeply in love with my wife, whom I had great respect and admiration for. I have been a woman sold into slavery to be used as a sex object by the Egyptian nobility.
The first of my points is this, I personally have lived both as men and women. I have been the cause, opponent, and victim of tyranny. ...and I suspect we ALL have done the same. To treat the issue of sexism from the point of view of 'men' apologizing to 'women' for 'their' treatment at 'our' hands is a small view that seems to miss the mark. It's a view that treats us all as if we are separate from each other and ignores us ALL as being both victims and oppressors on this issue.
It would be a far more profound statement to apologize (regardless of the gender of body we are currently living in) for our treatment of all those who have ever been at our own personal mercy, regardless of the reasons be it gender, ethnicity, beliefs, or anything else. The reason why I believe this apology would be so much more profound is because not only does it accept that we are all both victims and oppressors of prejudice in all its forms, but it also promotes real change. It promotes the sort of understanding that by hurting others we are hurting our selves. The statement takes an act of selfishness (I want to be treated well by others) and turns it into an act of greater good. (I will end sexism in order to insure my own well treatment, regardless of the body I am living in.) This apology should be aimed at yourself as well as your victims, for you are a victim of yourself too.
The second concern of this video I would like to point out is the "Everything feminine is 'good' and everything masculine is 'evil'" message this video had as an underlying theme. This creates multiple societal problems.
In the people who currently live in the bodies of women, this statement builds the idea that everything they think and feel is both 'good' and an 'improvement' regardless of how hateful or sexist their ideas are. This actually leads many women to living more in the darker side of the masculine energies than most men do. These women want the domination of women over men as opposed to equality between women and men. In other words, they do not want a better world, they want to perpetuate the same problem but with the roles reversed. (It strikes me as important to remember that these women will eventually be born again as men and the current men will eventually be born as women. And then where will they, personally, be?)
Another important aspect of the "Feminine is good, masculine is evil" theme is the damage that it does to the self esteem of young boys. Any message spoken often enough will eventually be believed, (as any woman raised in this over-sexed society can attest to.) If you are a small boy, and you are constantly told that by being a boy you are bad or (even worse) evil, this will do horrible psychological damage to your view of self. You will grow up not liking yourself, and this dislike of self will usually manifest in one of two ways. You will either choose to not be a man (take that sentence in whatever way you wish), or you will choose to become the evil definition of what you are told men are supposed to be. Not only is neither outcome healthy but neither outcome will allow the small boy to grow up to be what he is meant to be, which is a strong but nurturing man who protects his family and feels comfortable with being himself.
Currently everyone in our society seems to be well aware of the subconscious message to young girls that you have to be "Sexy" to have value, but everyone also seems universally blind to it's sister message to young boys that it's "bad" or "wrong" to be a man. Both of these messages deserve our equal attention if we really do want a better world to live in.
Both masculine and feminine energies have their light and dark sides. The light side of masculinity turns you into a loyal protector and provider. The dark side of masculinity turns you into a selfish tyrant. The light side of feminine energy turns you into a loving parent with strong ties to the community. The dark side of femininity turns you into ruthless manipulator.
We all have both energies and we have all lived as both genders. Instead of treating ourselves as if one half of the species is responsible for the suffering of the other half, we need to understand that ALL have oppressed ALL. And ALL of this needs to change. The goal should be to build the light energies in both our masculine and feminine sides as opposed to switching which gender of body is dominate in our society.
There is no 'them.' There is only 'us' and we are ALL responsible for us ALL.
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